My life has become a comma.A short interrupt command.I do things without actually realizing I am doing them.I sense but I don't feel.I am not alone but lonely.I am as good as ever but still bad like always.I miss people but I don't think about them when I should.I procrastinate things,even when I want to do them.I am torpid yet full of zeal.I am almost a full-stop but a comma yet.I like friends but I don't care about them.
There was this guy 'X' who asked me to arrange weed on last saturday,and even though I could have,I didn't.Not that I didn't want to,but I just couldn't.I am insecured about everything.I am hopeless.I have become an atheist.I want to pray but I just can't.There was also this girl 'Y' whom I love a lot but she thinks I don't love her.Then there are 3 other people 'A,B&C' who have been with me when I wanted them to be with me,but I just can't seem to be able to spend time with them.Then there is this professor in my college professor 'F' who is one of the biggest jerks I have ever seen in my life.An Ex-HOD by chance,he just can;t get words out of his mouth.He also makes a buzzing sound at the end of every word ending in 's',like he says "Letzz go and Kick some azz".I almost sleep in his class everyday but he doesn't notice and that bugs me even more.
I just want things to be fine.Once,for always.I want to go far from here.To some island with a bed,BeanBag,an I-pod and my Laptop.I want to watch the sunrise and sunset,both together.I want to see a butterfly.The same butterfly I saw 6 years back when I was playing with my best friends in Viceroy Garden.I want to meet all my good friends,present and previous,5 years from now in the same island.I want to listen to The all-American Rejects.I want to eat superhot Aaloo ka paratha with loads of butter on top of it.I want to see the butter melting and losing its existence.I want to smile when I see it losing.I want to co-relate myself with butter.I know it sounds funny,but the butter is the only thing I can come up with right now.I want to watch 'The Big Bang Theory'.I also want a date with 'Emmanuelle Chirqui'.I want to play.I want everything.I want to wakeup one day and see myself in the list of Forbe's richest people.I want to become big.I want to become more matured.I want to laugh like no-one ever can.No-one ever will.I want to laugh at myself.I want to laugh at everyone.I want to laugh when I am happy.I want to laugh when I am sad.I want to be free.I hate being a Comma.I want to be an Exclamation mark.I want to be a bird.I want to fly.I want to love and be loved.I want people to trust me.I want them to understand me.I want time to stop.I don't want to get tired.I want to stop time and walk to the island.I want to sleep.Sleep like a 6 month child.A 6 month girl preferably.I want to die.Right now.I want to be a full-stop Right now.Peace.
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